#maybe rn is not the best time but ill go back to being a good moot once my mental health aint shite 🙏🙏

[royalelo]

UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!! HIII MOOT?? MOOT?? OH ALSO IM SCOTTISH AND MIXED AZERBAIJANI AND SAUDI :p

[phagodyke]

nvm im too tired and overstimulated for this shit

[imaginesig]

“Could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived”

pt2: "Ditch the clowns, get the crown / baby I'm the one to beat"

Lewis Hamilton x Reader

SMAU

The reader is a singer-songwriter who just broke up with long term fiancé Lewis Hamilton. Of course she wrote a gut wrenching album to cope.

This is gonna be a lot of shitting on Lewis— absolutely no hate! I just love a good heartbreak and the Tortured Poets Department

Also dates aren’t accurate bc I don’t have time to worry abt all that and I totally stole all of this from real life- not an ounce of originality

yn_ln

Liked by lewishamilton, mercadesamgf1, user28, and 928,928 others

yn_ln: pinky promise to always by your side 🏎️

Tagged: lewishamilton

lewishamilton pinky promise to always be by YOUR side

yn_ln ♥️

mercadesamgf1 always a pleasure to host our pop princess!

yn_ln always a pleasure to be hosted!!

user1 looks always kill in the paddock

user2 ugh to be in the F1 paddock watching my driver fiancee on weekends I'n not touring

user3 stunning!!

user4 the pinky promise makes me physically ill😭

user5 fr WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN

carmenmmundt gorgeous! Always a good time with you 🫶

yn_ln dinner soon?

carmenmmundt yes please!!

Load more comments

lewishamilton

Liked by yn_ln, user2, mercadesamgf1, and 810,298 others

lewishamilton: could’ve been better but back to work for next week

Tagged: yn_ln

user1 being a Hamilton fan used to be fun, I used to be happy

user2 the second photo is so fanfic coded I can't

user3 omg yes!!

user4 maybe Ferrari will be championship #8

user5 hottest couple in the paddock

mercadesamgf1 watch out Australia 👊💥

yn_ln

Liked by lewishamilton, sabrinacarpender, user92, and 929,290 others

yn_ln: Argentina I’m so glad we were able to dance my best dress with you! Until next time 🫶🎇

tagged: no one

user1 BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE

user2 babe wake up a dancing Taylor post just dropped

sabrinacarpender such an electric crowd!!

yn_ln thank you for your hype work

lewishamilton: wonderful show once again!!

user3 best night ever

user4 AHHH STUNNING

user5 manifesting tickets so hard rn

lewishamilton posted a story

Caption: Help me hold on to you ♥️

ynupdates

Liked by user1, user5, user9, and 819,109 others

ynupdates: Superstar Y/n L/n and boyfriend Lewis Hamilton after her show in Argentina!!

tagged: lewishamilton, yn_ln

user1 LMAO the update account rlly said she's everything and he's just Ken

user2 the wine was iconic!!

user3 omg that's my photo!!

user4 we thank you for your service

user5 you know she was jumping with joy bc of those boots

user6 omg irl! I can't imagine how her feet feel after heels all show

user7 they are so sweet

user8 get yourself a man who takes you out after work

user9 my fav couple fr fr

Twitter—

yn_ln

liked by sabrinacarpender, carmenmmundt, user9, and 928,029 others

ln_yn: Round of applause for Brazil for their incredible rain show!!

tagged no one

user1 the first pic 😳

user2 chills, literal chills

user3 the entire vibes of the whole show was wow

user4 I agree and I was watching through a fuzzy live stream

user5 anybody else need illicit affairs (angry verson) on Spotify now

user6 me me me!!

user7 Y/n make it happen

user8 it kinda felt personal ngl

user9 best night ever!! I went as fearless in a gold dress and to say I danced in a storm in my “best dress” with Y/n was incredible!!

user10 omg that’s so lucky!!

yn_ln

liked by user92, sabrinacarpender, girlsinred, and 928,929 others

yn_ln: Thank you South America for welcoming me with open arms for this leg of the tour!! I will miss you all dearly over break but rest and relaxation is important for an awesome European leg!!

tagged: no one

user1 I’m gonna miss the fuzzy live streams 😭

user2 gets some rest Queen!!

user3 I can’t wait for the second leg!! Let’s go Europe🫶🫶

user4 it’s go time to get my Eras outfit

user8 I need ideas!!

user4 me and my boyfriend are going as Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

user9 I’m dressing in a white dress with a small veil that says “fucked in the head” and messed up makeup bc champagne problems is one of my favs

user10 I love it!!

user5 anybody else sad Lewis wasn’t at these last few shows, nor was she at any races or seen near mercades home base

user6 they’ve been together for 6 years, I’m not worried abt them spending some time focused on their jobs without each other

user7 yea and they’re really private so I’m sure they’ll catch up plenty during her break

lewishamilton

liked by mercadesamgf1, user1, user8, and 928,292 others

lewishamilton: not the results we needed but that’s what growing is all about

tagged: no one

comments have been disabled

lewishamilton

liked by georgerussel, mercadesamgf1, user83, and 718,292 others

lewishamilton: that’s P2💪

tagged: no one

mercadesamgf1 that's our driver!!🏆

georgerussell congrats man! bloody good driving today

lewishamilton double point weekend

comments have been limited

Twitter—

yn_ln

liked by user4, user9, ynhq, and 918,918 others

yn_ln: All’s fair in love and poetry, April 4th

tagged: no one

comments have been limited

Twitter pre-album release—

Twitter post-album release—

yn_ln

liked by: user433, user94, user93, and 282,209 others

yn_ln: surprise!! "The Tortured Poets Department: Eros" out now!! This edition includes two new songs, "So High School" and "The Alchemy"

tagged: no one

comments have been disabled

[mickyschumacher]

Hi hun

Could you maybe write a smau about Charles x Brazilian!reader and maybe she’s like a famous actress or something?

Thank you 🤍🤍

𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐇𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 .ೃ࿐

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: after being publicly mistreated by your ex-boyfriend, fans couldn't be more welcoming to a certain f1 driver.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: mentions of cheating, poor humor, google translated portuguese

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: charles leclerc x famous brazilian actress!fem!reader

𝐅𝐂: bruna marquezine

𝐀/𝐍: i opted for a sm au after getting ill this week so hope ya'll don't mind! i was also stuck between bruna and livia as the fc but i figured my girlie bruna was the best! hope this was okay anon ♡︎

𝐏.𝐒: i don't think there are much plots in sm aus so there wasn't much here lol! also getting danny ric back at this time is kinda crazy. couldn't believe it when i saw it... but i also feel for nick :(

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

charles_leclerc posted on his story!

yourusername

liked by masonmount, charles_leclerc, zendaya, and 2,304,093 others

yourusername: cura ♡ healing♡

view all 53,041 comments

leclercs: guYS THE DOG 👀

norrarijimin: they're soft launching 🤧🥺

zendaya: beautiful girl ❤️

yourusername: says you ♡︎

ynauurrrr: i miss her and n tho 🤧

ynbestgirl: bestie no one misses him lmao

f1gossip

liked by leclercs, pierregasly, ynbestgirl and 24,942 others

f1gossip: Rumoured WAG Y/N L/N has been promoting her heavily anticipated show in the Netherlands and seen taking pictures with her fans, a few days before the Dutch Grand Prix.

tagged: yourusername

view all 745 comments

ausnorris1: it just keeps getting better am i right?

ynbestgirl: does she ever have a day off being the prettiest woman in the world?

norrarijimin: no one talking about gasly's like?

leclercs: the drama this man likes to start...

pierregasly liked this comment!

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, landonorris, and 3,294,291 others

yourusername: here are some behind the scenes while you wait for the first episode tonight!

tagged: romuloestrela, johnnyomassaro

view all 63,304 comments

romuloestrela: uau… estamos incríveis. wow... we look amazing.

johnnyomassaro: modelos models

yourusername: obviamente... obviously...

ynbestgirl: IT'S GONNA BE SO GOOOOOOD

leclercs: talent with talent... love to see it!

charles_leclerc posted to his story!

[ charles_leclerc: new day, new show recommendation for tifosi! #deusslaveorei ]

[ charles_leclerc: favourite character is caterina ❤️ #deusslaveorei ]

yourusername posted on her story!

[ yourusername: i hope singapore is ready for ferrari! thank you for having me f1 ♡︎ ]

[ yourusername: the singapore grand prix winner doesn't want to show his face... anyways... proud of you charles_leclerc ]

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc, pierregasly, and 1,203,951 others

charles_leclerc: birthday break with the people i love before the us grand prix! still in shape and ready to win ❤️

tagged: arthur_leclerc, lorenzotl, leclerc_pascale

view all 5,394 comments

danielricciardo: happy birthday mate! hope you had a good one ❤️

pierregasly: happy birthday bro

landonorris: why no invite brooo :(

carlossainz55: ^^

arthur_leclerc: man i look good

charles_leclerc: it's the genes

lorenzotl: you're welcome ♡︎

arthur_leclerc: ...

norrarijimin: WHY DIDN'T U TAG HER AHFSRHEAKRHESIJRB

leclercs: they're still soft launching for god's sake 😭💀

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, zendaya, and 5,938,214 others

yourusername: he wins in méxico, he wins in são paulo ♡︎ proud of you, meu lindo. proud of you, my beautiful.

tagged: charles_leclerc

view all 100,392 comments

pierregasly: FINALLY

leclercs: LMAOOOO PIERRE

pierregasly: i thought i was going to die if i had to keep it a secret any longer 🤧

charles_leclerc: a for effort ig

charles_leclerc: thank you, chérie. thank you, sweetheart

ausnorris1: anyone checking up on ynbestgirl?

ynbestgirl: choosing to happily throw myself over a cliff rn.

norrarijimin: room for two?

ynbestgirl: ofc

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, pierregasly, landonorris, and 3,283,983 others

charles_leclerc: not that we've been hiding it but this is y/n, the love of my life. say hi y/n!

view all 13,078 comments

landonorris: hi y/n! yourusername

pierregasly: hi yourusername

danielricciardo: hiiiiiii yourusername

carlossainz55: hi! yourusername

yourusername: ...

yourusername: i have mixed feelings about this post

yourusername: what are these photos? 😭

charles_leclerc: what do you mean? they're my memories of you 😄

ynbestgirl: STOP IT CHARLES MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE yourusername liked this comment!

yourusername: ^

leclercs: and here lies ynbestgirl. y/n's biggest fan. passed on the 7th of november 2023 due to y/n herself

ynbestgirl: they do say never meet your heroes 😭

yourusername: i–

© 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑

[runningfrom2am]

requiem // part four

summary: according to coriolanus snow, his best friend had the most beautiful voice in all of panem. she had been training her whole life constantly to get where she was; being up for a residency at the most elite opera house in all of panem. singing was her passion. her true love; and when that got stripped from her in a second, his world became a whole lot quieter. he loathed every minute of it.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 2.3k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: opera singer!mentor!reader (blink and you'll miss it), she's kind of a prodigy!! p cool imo, mute!reader, bestfriend!coryo, friends to lovers trope ooo, mentions of graphic violence early on (particularly the prologue) but after that it's pretty safe, depictions of ptsd/trauma, mental illness and minor suicidal ideation but at least she's not entirely alone, descriptions of minor medical treatments and use of medication.

a/n: fighting for my LIFE trying to sort out my student loans rn. also i'm sick. butttt i did just finally get my hands on hogwarts legacy so that's eating up all my time. anyway that's a small update on my life.

also, reminder to follow @runningfrom2am-library and turn on my notifications there to join my taglist for this series!!

my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)

send me any and all of your thoughts! here!

series masterlist // playlist // pinterest board

three months earlier

"You could write her a song." Clemensia suggests with a shrug, tapping her pen against the inkwell, hardly looking up from it.

Coryo scoffs, shaking his head. "Don't mock me, Clemmie. I'm serious."

"So am I!" She laughs, facing her palms up against the table and looking across at him now. "She likes music, it's like, the only thing she likes. It would make her happy, I'd bet. Is that not the whole point?"

In the face of something so juvenile as asking his best friend to go to their graduation gala together, Coryo is stumbling. You were his best friend, yes, he could just outright ask- especially considering nearly everyone had already just assumed that the two of you would be attending together, but something about that didn't sit right with him.

Other girls were getting special things. Flowers, jewelry, notes, and love letters that he had genuinely heard that, on a couple of occasions, brought tears to their eyes. Not that he wanted you to cry, but... He wanted you to feel that he cared. It was important to him that you knew he really cared.

"It is." He grumbles, rubbing his forehead.

"Okay, then-"

"I'm not writing her a song."

Clemensia sighs, rolling her eyes. "It doesn't have to be any good. Maybe it's even better if it's bad! She'd get a good laugh out of it too."

"Yes, and then I'd never live it down." He says, pushing his hair back out of his eyes and trying to put his focus on the assignment they were supposed to be working on. "Besides, I didn't ask for your advice. I don't need it."

"Yes, you do." She insists with a teasing smile, reaching over the table and poking him in the shoulder with her pen. "You wouldn't have told me otherwise. You were just too scared to ask directly."

Coryo lets out a deep breath through his nose, shaking his head in quiet denial, but she can easily make out the pink tinge on his cheeks.

"Coryo, you know she'll say yes no matter what, right?" She adds, her voice softer this time.

"That's not... that's not what I'm worried about. Necessarily, I mean."

"Ah." Clemensia hums in response, taking the end of her ink pen between her teeth. "More like... you just don't want her to get the impression that she was a last resort?"

"She's not." He defends quickly.

She raises her hands defensively, a short and quiet laugh falling from her lips in the library. "I know. I know that. I'm just clarifying that you don't want her to get that impression."

When he doesn't respond, pretending to pour all his focus into taking notes again, Clemensia lets out a dramatic sigh. "I don't know, just ask her. She knows you well enough that I really don't think it matters. Just... when's the next time you're hanging out?"

"Not sure." He mumbles, scribbling down some notes that he knows are hardly legible.

"Well, what about after class today? See if she wants to go get coffee or something."

"She's coaching until seven."

"Tomorrow?"

"Rehearsals."

Clemensia lets out a huff. "This weeken-"

"Orchestra practice." He cuts her off this time.

"Panem that girl is busy." She sighs. "How does she even have any friends at all?"

"We make time." He shrugs nonchalantly, as if it didn't bother him that he hardly ever saw his best friend this late in the academic year. That was common for you, though. Usually come summer and fall you had more free time to share with him. And he was happy to wait- it wasn't like he didn't get busy during exam seasons too.

"Okay, well, now is the time to 'make time'." She exclaims sternly, leaning closer across the table and lowering her voice to a whisper. "Because I heard rumours that Sejanus Plinth was intending on asking her, and you and I both know that she is far too kind to say no. Even if he is District."

Coriolanus' jaw tenses at that and he grips his pen just a little bit harder. "Have you done question fifteen yet?"

He had already been thinking about that for weeks, and he would torture himself for another week before he finally took Clemensia's advice and "made time".

You had seen him since that conversation he had had with Clemmie, but that didn't mean he could ever get himself to actually bring up graduation outside of asking you casually if anyone had asked you yet. To which, the answer was always an unbothered "no", and a shrug that allowed you to mask the sadness behind your smile.

He didn't exactly "make time", though. His plan was quite the opposite. Knowing you had morning practice, he got to the academy early and shoved the folded up paper in your locker and practically ran down the empty halls to the library. No taking it back now.

'A note? That's so stupid! She's your best friend! Just ask!' His thoughts race at him, but that's exactly why he did it this way. He couldn't back out again now.

"Coryo," Your familiar voice says as you slide into the seat next to him, hair perfectly styled and uniform ironed flat despite the early morning you must have had.

He looks over at you, eyes slightly wide out of nervousness. "Uh, hey... How's, um... How's your morning?" He asks, trying his best to play it casual.

You smile, sliding the folded up piece of paper you had found in your locker back over to him. "Good." You answer, already going about taking out your books. "Yours?"

"Good." He nods, mouth dry as he stares down at the paper, looking between the sheet and you.

Silently, you nod for him to open it, a small smile on your lips.

He hesitates before opening it, the conscious effort it takes to not tremble taking over his nerves.

He curses himself for his own fears about what it would say, blinking a couple times before reading the note.

'Want to go to the grad gala with me? -Coriolanus'

And then in small, flawless handwriting, a swift and smooth print that lacked any hesitation, there was a new line underneath.

'Yes :)'

"I only tried on fifty different dresses to decide on the fit and style of what I wanted." You say with a slight laugh, unzipping the garment bag that held your dress.

Coryo was sitting on your bed, like he often did, hands fidgeting in his lap. Fifty dresses to him seemed unnecessary, certainly you looked just fine in the very first one all the way through to the very last. But he did understand how seriously your family took your dresses, for both your performances and events like the one you would be attending together.

"That's... that's a fair few dresses." He laughs with a small nod, gazing into your closet and away from you for just a moment, trying to get a glimpse at your performance gowns you had stashed in bags and lining the wall. It's a wonder you had room for everything, he knew you had never tossed or re-worn a single one- all large in either sheer poofiness and volume, or bright colours and patterns that drew the eye and held them hostage in your form. Sometimes both. Coryo was never sure if it was the intent to make you look like a princess from a fairytale, but a few times a year he got to see you look just like one. What he imagined them all to be, anyway, when recalling the storybooks his mother read to him and left on the untouched shelves in his should-have-been baby sister's nursery.

"Yes, well, I wanted it to be perfect." You hum, pulling the dress out of the bag and turning to him, holding it up against your chest. "Thoughts?"

Coryo nods in response, swallowing hard. The dress was stunning, and the colour was rich- it would compliment the tones of your skin and hair beautifully. He had very little technical knowledge of fashion, but what had trickled into his mind from Tigris would lead him to believe it would be complimentary to you.

But he had no idea how he would match that.

The last of his father's salvageable dress clothes was that shirt Tigris is working on for the reaping ceremony in a couple of months, and he couldn't possibly wear that twice. If she could even salvage it. Maybe he should ask her to prioritize making it into something that would better match your dress, or just wear it plain white with the black stripes to the gala instead, so he would at least feel worthy of standing at your side. Then he could wear his academy uniform on reaping day, and claim he forgot the occasion. Would that be believable?

No, of course not. That's the day the Plinth Prize will be awarded.

Hopefully to him. Definitely to him, he had to pray. He was never a religious man- no one really was anymore, but reading about it in pre-Panem history textbooks, he couldn't deny the temptation to beg some higher power for help.

The prize would solve everything.

"You like it?" You ask, drawing him from his internal panic and he nods, smiling.

"Yeah, yes. Wow. It's lovely." He nods, clearing his throat.

"Thank you." You grin, looking down at the dress and smoothing it against your leg a bit to try and get another good look at it yourself.

You let out a soft sigh of contentment before hanging it back up. "Anyway, do you want to do like a matching thing, or is that tacky?" You ask, turning to face him again.

Coryo purses his lips in thought, drumming his fingers on his lap. "I'm not sure. Are other people matching?"

You knew about his situation, of course, though he wasn't fond of talking about it. Obviously not, who would be? It never bothered you, at the end of the day he was still your best friend- even if he never let you come over to the renowned Snow penthouse unless it was some kind of emergency. Regardless, as far as the two of you knew, you were the only one outside of his family who had any idea. And you both intended to do everything you could to keep it that way.

"I think so, I heard some of the other girls talking about it." You say with a shrug. "Just something simple like a matching tie or something, we don't have to go crazy with it."

"Right." He nods, thinking it over.

"Here," You say after a moment, reaching into the bottom of the garment bag and pulling out a much smaller plastic bag with fabric samples in it from when your dress was made. "I asked for more extra than they would normally give for fabric samples, in case we wanted to match. I was hoping we could ask Tigris to make a tie or a pocket square or something, or maybe cover your cuffs with it." You suggest, sitting on the bed next to him and holding out the bag.

His heart aches as he reaches out to take it from your soft hands. It's hard to place, almost- whether or not it's gratefulness or loathing of the fact you had considered such a thing at all. Attending an event with a Snow should not include the accommodation of whether or not they could afford to dress accordingly.

The bitterness fades and settles into thankfulness for you, and all you do for him. Silently. Without discussion, without real, significant thought.

You could be friends with anyone; the girls with wealth enough to bathe in like your own, Sejanus Plinth, even, whose family quite literally bought their way into the Capitol. But you chose him.

Granted, when you chose him, you didn't have the slightest clue of the financial state of his family name, but even when you had stumbled across that fact, it didn't deter you. Coriolanus often wonders why, but who was he to question it? Hell, sometimes he wonders if the roles had been reversed, would he have been so gracious?

"Thanks." Coryo mutters, clearing his throat and nodding. "I mean, she's the expert, so I'll talk to her about what she thinks will work best."

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea." You agree with a soft laugh that makes him smile by instinct alone. He couldn't help it.

"Um, I meant to ask," Coryo says after a moment, tucking his feet up on the bed and sitting back a bit, getting more comfortable. "Did your coach agree to let you change your song for the year end gala? The one you pitched to her, that was really good. You did amazing. At least, in my opinion but I don't really know what I'm talking about."

"Thank you." You reply through a sigh, laughing slightly as you flop back on the soft cushioned duvet next to him. "But, yes and no. Yes she's letting me do something other than 'Never Enough', but it's not that song I showed her while you were there. She said it was too long and would disrupt the entire schedule, which, in hindsight does make sense and I wouldn't want to do that to everyone else."

"Well, what is it?" Coryo replies, eager to hear something new from you. It was special, he knew that it was. He had seen first hand how badly you wanted to do something else.

You smile, looking up at him as he leaned back on his hands next to you, blue eyes searching yours as if they could somehow portray the answer sooner than your lips- despite you knowing it would be a song he's never heard or even heard of before.

"I decided on something else. It's gonna be a surprise." You answer with a small, almost sly smile while you prop yourself up on your elbow, gazing up at him with your chin in your palm. "But you're gonna love it, I think."

You really hoped he would, at least.

While Coryo protests, tries to squeeze the information out of you in the light-hearted way only a best friend could, you don't budge. The song in title and content reminds you far too much of him; of his pretty face, and electric soul.

no taglist this time around!! my fics usually get over a hundred requests to be added to the taglist so instead i made a library! follow me over on @runningfrom2am-library and turn on notifs to get updates when i post new parts!!

[chrissdollie]

♡ ⸝⸝ BACK IN THE DOLLHOUSE, 2k / off hiatus event　🎀

what is this event? ♡

hii! i havent written anything in over a month due to working on my other acc and personal affairs. however, this is me coming back, ready to write more than ever! its going to be a little difficult juggling two different accs at the same time but i dont mind ! anyways ehehehe in advance, thank u so much for 2k !!!!

you can send in any request (still respecting my rules ofc !) and ill write for it ! this is the masterlist and ill tag my usual list for each post. please don't rush me for any of these, the event hasn't even offically started and i've already gotten like 5 reqs LMAOO please be patient <3

everything you see is up to date ♡

yummy, huh?

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: Could you pls write something about chris with a gf who has an oral fixation which can get rly bad when she’s anxious leading to her biting on her nails or lips too much to the point of bleeding and chris being the best bf he is lets her suck on his fingers for stres relief and maybe even his dick 🎀

eclipse chapter three

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: (shh technically this isnt a request request but it still counts hehe)

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: can you please do a rapper!chris and singer!reader where they are about to perform together and reader is really nervous but chris comforts her and is really sweet on stage? i hope this is specific enough<3

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: Basically a part 2 to the singer!reader x rapper!chris headcannons because that was SO good lemme know if thats not specific. Also maybe one where the reader goes out of the country for a tour and shes gone for a while and then she gets back. Another one that is like some of both of their songs and what they are about (idk) Maybe a smut where during one of her shows, reader gets down and dirty with her dancing and then chris gets a little jealous and punishes (dom!rapper!chris)

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: rapper Chris catching singer reader watching edits of him while she’s getting her makeup and hair done for tour 🤭

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: RANDOM THINGS THAT SINGER READER DOES THAT DRIVES CHRIS INSANE AND VICE VERSA

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: RANDOM THINGS THAT SINGER READER DOES THAT DRIVES CHRIS INSANE AND VICE VERSA

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: HEADCANON OF CHRIS IN DIFFERENT POSITIONS??? please and thank yew😊

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: rapper!chris gets physical at a show because some guy was being a perv to singer!reader

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: hi queen! can you please make a Chris x Plus!sized reader fic where fans are sending hate to the reader bc of her looks/weight and Chris goes off on them and comforts reader? can you tell that I'm craving resolved angst rn ANYWAY ILYYYYY AND THE NEW SMUT U DROPPED WAS AMAZING AHHH

i'm a good girl, officer

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: cop!chris where he pulls reader over and idk what to happen next or if it should be smut or fluff

UNNAMED

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: spider!man chris headcanons where he cares for reader and stuff he does

peek-a-boo

🐈₊˚ ⊹　requested by: anon :: this one is so random but could you do one where reader likes the dark so she never turns on lights in her house and prefers natural light from the big windows in her house and so chris fucks her in the dark because she likes the dark so much

[gamblersdoll]

PUT MY NAME ON IT, NOW IT DESIGNER. 1

New message!

“girl you gon call me or what?”

it made you roll your eyes. hakari always didnt like if you didnt respond right away, assuming something was wrong and you were in trouble or mad at him, that was a pro and con of him.

you started typing, making sure to turn off the notifications or sounds coming from your phone. you would occasionally look up to see your current boyfriend, sinji, still focused on the damn game… like always.

you readjusted your bonnet, finally pressing send.

Message sent!

“what do you want? cant call rn.”

you felt your heart drop to your ass when he immediately started typing, fucking creep. you couldnt call him– not with sinji right infront of you and not to hakari. the hell could he possibly want at … eleven thirty-two at night?

New message!

“ite, but call me l8tr.”

yeah, absolutely not.

. . . . .

maybe you shouldve called him, because for the past two days he had called you and only to have seventeen voicemails from him. if you had given him a chance you wouldve found it as a turn on. but knowing history, history.

“so, did cha call him?” maki asked, leaning in close to you. you never know why she asks even if she doesnt like hakari. but she could be very nosey.

“uh oh, boy drama!” gojo chimed, “well— whats his naaameee?” that damn idiot satoru.

you tuned everything out, only having to be pestered by he himself. you shut down your phone, needing a break from it anyway. you owned your own apartment, which was good, until it wasnt. you walked in to only see your boyfriend had left, which was fortunate and unfortunate, knowing sinji had only came over cause you had the good wifi and food. so you debated, call or not? you finally said fuck it. powering your phone back on and then taking a shower to relax first.

the hot water running down your hair and skin was always what relaxed you the most, nerves going away and settling until you prepared yourself for the worse and hoped for the best. throwing on a old oversized shirt and hopping into the bed, you pressed the call button.

ring!

ring!

you heard shuffling and bassbooted music in the back, and somewhat of yelling.

“look who’s pretty ass decided to call me.” hakari always called you pretty. no matter if you were throwing up or throwing a tantrum, as he would call it, no matter what.

“you said you wanted to talk, so talk.” you held a straight face, only trying to fight away the memories of what used to be your relationship.

“ill assume you heard about me dropping out and being some gambler or whatever, havent you mama?” he chuckled, waiting for you.

“sure, and dont call me mama, i have a whole—“ he interrupted you.

“yeah yeah yeah, your lil’ boyfriend or something.” he finished for you, immediately growing annoyed at the thought of you being with someone that wasnt him. “anyways, you’ll be getting your money back, and its been tripled.” what?

“you do realize its been a little over a year since that happened.” you deadpanned.

“its better than ten. i promised you didnt i?” hakari deadpanned back, matching you always. “i always keep my promises. you know that.” he stated.

“okay, good to know. anything else?” you tried to hurry the call, hoping to hop off of it. you heard him laughing in the back, calming himself.

“always, im inviting you to my club, you got till the end of the week or imma just have someone escort you here. got business to talk about.” hakari said, adding that onto your plate.

“so you deadlining me now?”

“you damn right.”

“ill think on it. now get off my phone.” you said, rolling your eyes.

he chuckled, exhaling. “hope to see you soon, babydoll.”

call ended!

you rubbed your face in your hands, that went better than expected? putting your phone on the charger and laying there, you should have not been on edge, but it was hakari, and you felt your phone vibrate. what time had it been? twelve o five.

for hakari, he knows how to wire transfer, infact pretty well.

“make sure it gets to her, or imma fuck yall up. dont make me repeat myself.” hakari warned, leaning back against his soft couch watching some fight he placed a bet on. he puffed out smoke from the joint he held, only waiting.

“its been transferred, kinji.” the words exactly he wanted to hear. “she’s gonna get it by twelve o five.”

by twelve o five, a hundred and fifty thousand had been transferred to your account.

repost, reblogs, shares, and tags are so welcomed.

[maxthesillyy]

what do you think about the characters in Double Exposure so far?

the characters themselves arent that bad,, but i definitely cant say i really care for any of them yet. as in i wouldnt be that upset at any of their deaths

at first i was NOT vibing right with Safi at all considering literally all of her jokes are straight up hit or miss, but the more we learn about her (or. learn that we have a lot to learn) the more i’ve grown interested and fond of her. she kinda gives Way Too Excited For 8 AM Teacher vibes.

Moses is kinda intriguing to me right now, but is also pretty much a nothing burger,, i can only assume (and hope) i’ll see more about him after chapter 1. so. he’s kinda silly, thats about it.

OH Loretta. i hate her so much, she’s so funny, i love her. i always love to hate a good bitchy girl character. oh my cod— ESPECIALLY when the look she gives Max if u try to call her bluff. im definitely hella excited to see more of her— especially since she clearly brought out the more bitchy side of Max. honestly so far i think these two’s dynamic is my favorite. she kinda feels like Max, Victoria, and Rachel all smushed together.

then theres Gwen,,, the game’s definitely setting us up to be suspicious of her. i dont have many thoughts about her though other than that. shes hot ? kinda endearing when shes not pissed at us. thats about it.

Amanda……………. 😒 she exists ig. no fr though, she’s literally fine. she feels more like a quirky best friend disney channel character than a real person. and then theres with the game SHOVING her and max together… idk! maybe ill warm up to her. i dont want to hate her but the game is very quickly pulling me down that route.

oh then the other guy max can flirt with for some godforsaken reason?? Vinh is his name i think. i dont trust him, and i dont think were supposed to. personally i think it feels ooc for max to openly flirt with him back— especially so quickly,, even if she’s doing it jokingly or smth. like girl you were just either talking about how you can never recognize when youre being flirted with or need to take time before flirting back with someone— AND even then. you’d think max would be more wary of overly charming who show an interest in her.

which brings me to Lucas. im guessing if anything happens with him he’s gonna be a red herring. maybe it’s just me, but i wouldn’t be surprised if were supposed to be reminded of jefferson when we see him,, at least he doesnt have any real interest in her though.

pretty sure Amanda and Vinh are the only two love interests? either way i honestly dont think it makes sense for Max to be seeking either of them out romantically. this may be the Aro in me, but chloe was a realistic “love interest” in the OG game because well. they were Max and Chloe. and besides that Max was already with her basically 24/7, and was obsessed with her. they made sense. they werent forced or obviously placed there just to be love interests— it was natural.

honestly Amanda and Vinh just seem like.. love interests for the sake of love interests.

tbh any love interest for Max right now just feels,,,, maybe could’ve been the right person but WAY too wrong of a time. like i dont even see an interesting unhealthy dynamic— and if i wanted that i would just go to current DE!pricefield so.

this brings me to Chloe… im happy she’s haunting the narrative rn,,, could be doing it a little harder imo—but other than that im. trying not to form any huge opinions on the Max and Chloe situation. when we (hopefully istg decknine) get the whole picture ill probably talk about this more. im just pretty conflicted.. and also wishing decknine just CHOSE one of the endings (bay WHO SAID THAT) instead of leaving it open to not piss anyone off.

oh uh then Reggie and Diamond,, i dont have any thoughts about them really except for being mildly intrigued by the amount of attention handed over to Diamond. im guessing she’ll have more plot relevance later,,, but Reggie will prob stay a very side character.

i thinkkk thats everyone? OH. Yasmin. not much about her. can appreciate how much she cares about Safi’s murder. but yeah nobody else comes to mind,,, and if i did miss somebody i guess that just goes to show how little i think of them.

so i guess overall my thoughts about the DE characters are “we’ll have to see what happens.”

[catgirlbussy]

holy shit i just realised im autistic

i know this seems like a shitpost, and tbf i am laughing at myself pretty hard rn. it's dawning on me at 6 AM after being awake all night, but (if you care, and if you don't feel free to ignore too, have a nice day!) hear me out, cause this genuinely feels meaningful and insightful for me with how my life has gone so far. I spent an hour writing this post in hopes someone might find it helpful too :3c

If you don't wanna read my post pls enjoy this picture of our famous friend autism baby stackin those cans before you go~♪

(source: wikipedia)

l

like i already /knew/ I was before this moment, but i was thinkin about what i used to do as a kid and wow i am so autistic how the fuck did i not realise sooner. It straight up wasn't until I was already well into my 20's that I started to meet other autistic people online and learned about their experiences and difficulties from talking with them that I realised a lot of things they described matched for me too.

I live in assfuck nowhere so most of my life the only few times that I had met autistic people were like, folks who were nonverbal or whatever, just generally needing direct assistive care, and I never bothered to look things up on my own because I was already inundated with the pressures of growing up, school, mental health, etc. I remember one of the first times I had built up the courage to ask anyone about it, I was in the hospital because of mental health issues. This was in my second year uni, and when one of the doctors assessing me was asking me questions, I said I thought maybe I was autistic. He promptly and with a fair amount of snark told me that if I was autistic I wouldn't have gotten into university.

Thinking back, he was probably just an exhausted, fresh outta school resident with no special interest in psychiatric care (and also just seemed to suck in general), but it was enough that I shelved the idea for another 5 years.

Lo and behold, now I am lying here in bed, just absolutely gobsmacked by the VERY REAL idea that im autistic and like holy shit I feel so vindicated.

I've been on tumblr for just a bit, but I see a lot of folks talking in various neurodivergent circles about their experiences and that's been so wonderful for me. I also have a few good friend groups w/ a lot of neurodivergent folks, and that's been really exciting too.

Like, I'm still processing this cognitively as I'm writing, so please pardon this ill patterned post, but this feels like such a beneficial thing for me. Over time I've adapted a few strategies here and there to help myself accomplish various tasks, but now I feel so empowered to, like... actually figure stuff out.

Even after feeling confident I was autistic, it was this nebulous, floating concept in my head for so long of, "oh yeah im autistic or something idk," that I never really dedicated much effort to finding healthier ways to do things that didn't irk me or whatever. I don't feel like the label /itself/ is what is important to me here, but rather the awareness around why I do so many things in the ways that I do and that it's /okay/ that I do.

I don't want this post to go on too much longer, but I feel it's worth noting that I've fought for years with my family because they didn't understand why I was going about things the way I did. Again, remember, they all grew up in this cloistered hellhole too. But, surprise surprise, the times in my life that I have been doing better than any other are when I felt confident enough to ignore what everyone was trying to get me to go along with and instead just fashioned my own best methods (which also sometimes included informing said overbearing individual(s) to go fuck themselves cause I'm busy doing shit. It's hard for them to argue with me telling them as much when I would be completing X objective well, which is what they wanted in the first place).

I don't want to make this sound like I'm trying to be overconfident, but I mention as much instead as a sign of support for other neurodivergent folks to feel similarly empowered to drum to their own beat. Thinking back, I went from almost failing high school and ultimately retaking a grade to excelling in all my classes. Every single one. I know that's a relative assessment, you got variable difficulty levels, etc., and the grade score isn't important in and of itself, least of all because the school systems here (Canada) are a mess it seems, but just that alone as an idea, within the parameters of a particular system, I went from initial abject failure to thorough and lauded success.

Just think of what so many people could do if they weren't being pigeonholed into formats that absolutely aren't working for them.

I already have a boatload of (genuinely helpful by way of enabling access to proper education and treatment) diagnoses from my history of working with my (very wonderful and genuinely caring and helpful) psychiatrist that match with what I know about the neurodivergence term umbrella like ADHD, OCD, and bipolar, so it seems |autism| will feel quite at home in the group ^w^. I'll ask her about it at my next appointment to see if an official diagnosis has any value versus me just continuing to figure things out on my own.

Either way, I am thrilled right now thinking about the next time I get to shout

"FUCK YOU IM DOING AUTISTIC SHIT"

while an electric guitar squeals and lightning strikes all around me and I make cool stuff happen :3c.

[theropoda]

...... i have. PRAWBLEMS. with the ending but honestly i felt very unwell and gross rn so i had difficulty focusing in the first place, maybe if i watch it again when i feel better ill feel different. under read more bc this got long lol

disclaimer before anyone GETS at me: i am not a critic. im literally just some guy watching a tv show, and i am really more confused than anything so if you really enjoyed the finale and feel like it was the perfect way for the show to end im happy for you! i don't have any intent on arguing it Absolutely Wasn't. this isn't a Hatepost. just me airing my thoughts. that are probably really incoherent bc again, i feel unwell ;_; brain is more focused on my stomach than this damn show

i knew how this was gonna end, i did watch the end of this show before, ive always been familiar w house because i watched episodes of it on tv as a kid with my mom and sister and knew major plot points like amber's death and wilson's cancer and house faking his death and everything but. the details were lost on me. now that i know the details something about them just doesn't jive with me and feel right.

probably related to my earlier post about how even in the final season so much of house is the same. he tried to change for the better but he was still back. i mean the entire premise of the show is about "the disabled addict doctor who struggles to be a person" so if any of these magically stopped being there that'd be stupid ESPECIALLY him being a disabled addict which are so central to his character. so im definitely not complaining about that.

initially i thought him faking his death was insanely reckless but what other choice was available. if he went, Hey, im here! im alive he'd absolutely be going to jail. in jail so far away while his best friend, maybe his only friend would be dying alone. of course he did that. his only choice was ttofake his death to be with wilson. throwing away his whole life and legacy and career and reputation to be with him.

hilson endgame real but also, while watching the whole show i kept going from "tumblr didn't lie these guys are gay" to "Tumblr may have oversold it a bit". but that might just be in the nature of its episodic structure. not e everything is abt wilson there's other people in house's lofe but in that final season everything does speed up, suddenly and become about wilson. which brings me to the whole cancer thing. in my memory of the show from watching it as a kid, Wilson's cancer came up as a plot point WAY earlier and there is much more time to discuss it in the show. to ponder and delve into it, what it means for wilson, for house, for the show. but actually watching the show it feels very sudden....! i felt like the entire cancer thing, which plays so damn heavily into the SERIES FINALE, wasn't explored enough...? it felt rushed. but it might feel like it because well there's a difference between watching a show as it comes out on a schedule vs binge watching it on demand.

and another thing that irked me is- but this is more of a "this personally makes me Feel Sad and Weird" as opposed to genuine criticism is how EVERYONE thinks house is dead except Two People. that's crazy. i have a Thing for closure and knowing things, the truth, im a little paranoid about that, but it just feels insane to me that house's own parents, family, former and current colleges, lovers, everyone... they all think he's dead when he's not. i see how that is, in terms of the Narrative, a good thing? house is truly FREE now. and if other people knew they'd probably call the police. but also that's just kinda horrifying.... I don't know. idk. also wtf cuddy wasn't there at the funeral? D: obviously i know how their last meeting went but they were such big part of each other's lives im rlly shocked she wasn't there! or even showed up at ALL in the ending scene where we see where everyone's life has headed, a little scene of her, Rachel, and someone new

and also. ._. how did that fire even start in the first place?..... did i miss something....? uaaaaah. i should watch it again

ugh but despite my peeves. i want to pass this off as Just another show ive watched, time to move on to the next, because a big part of the reason i started house and kept going and even chose to watch it at the times i did was because i have been going through some rough shit mentally for the past. entire year plus. i have relied on it to keep me distracted. i want to just move onto the next distraction but i have become so attached, it's hard to not feel :/ and :( about 1) the fact it's over now 2) it ended in a way that makes me feel funny, and not in a good way. aaaahhhhh.

[vault-kid]

Hellllooooo. 7, 13, 18, 30, 32-35. (I hope I didnt repeat myself on a previous ask I’m high af rn)

ik u sent this last night but you being high as fuck is making me giggle so much. anyways woe Luna lore be upon ye

7. Do they wish they lived before the war / could go back to life before the war?

Watching Pre-War movies with James or Jonas always had her wondering what life would be like before the war, and not being stuck inside a Vault. She loved all of the pretty dresses the women wore, the music, and how "lively" everything seemed, but that's pretty much it!

13. What is the most frightening experience they have endured?

I can name a few!

One, that first damn Deathclaw encounter.

Two, Andale. Other than being absolutely revolted, she genuinely felt extremely alarmed and scared shitless when she sneaked inside the shed. (Serves her right for sneaking and breaking in, but her freak-radar was going off like crazy, and for good reason LOL)

And of course, her biggest full-blown panic attack was the night James left the Vault. Being suddenly woken up by Amata, and getting hit by the realization of everything scared the fuck out of her. As it would with anyone I think, but the fear of not knowing where your dad ran away to, or why. Plus, Luna always had this (possibly irrational) fear of disappointing James, which made the notion of him leaving and abandoning her even worse.

18. Do they have any disabilities, mutations, or implants / enhancements? Do they have any chronic illnesses?

VDS got her ass. No, she barely took her medication, and James being her dad did not stop her from lying about taking it 😭 She also has mild myopia, but she kind of stopped wearing glasses around age 15. She didn't appreciate those four-eyes comments LOL. It's not something that affects her that much, though. Other than that, I guess she also has the Ant Sight modification?

30. What decisions have they made or actions have they done that affect their canon wasteland? (Did they blow up Megaton, have they killed/spared any major characters, etc.)

This isn't much of an effect on the Wasteland canon, but also it kind of is?? But, the only one I can think of is her inability to fulfill Harold's wish. She simply couldn’t bring herself to kill him, and the idea that his existence might benefit the Wasteland got to her as well. However, she knew this decision was selfish on her part, and it was a really tough choice for her.

32. What is their go-to weapon or weapon class?

Luna loves her .44 Magnum and Sniper Rifleeee. She always tries her best to avoid upclose confrontation with anyone out there, so a good long-range scope is perfect. It also helps her see whatever is far away better! In the case of needing a super close-range (and I mean super close...) weapon, the Double-barrel shotgun is her favorite. She barely uses it, though. That shit is also loud as fuck... But it works!

33. What is their fight-or-flight response?

During her first few weeks, maybe months, out in the Wasteland, Luna would freeze up a lot of the times. Y'know, considering it's all a new, scary and fucked up environment. She was very panicky, but this also made her become hyper-aware of her surroundings, which would also come in handy. As for fight response, at least in the beginning, she would shoot aimlessly and freak out. That definitely means she got hurt a lot, but since then she's remembered what James and Jonas taught her on her 10th birthday, and ofc she's learned from her mistakes. Now, she tries her best to sneak and remain out of sight so she has better control of a situation.

34. What armor / clothing do they typically wear?

You'll usually see her with the armored Vault jumpsuit, or her Riley's Rangers armor. Luna tries her best to keep her Vault jumpsuit in one piece and clean (as clean as she can, anyway); it just means a lot to her. Fresh out of the Vault, she used to have her Tunnel Snakes jacket tied around her waist, too. Though, as the years go on, Luna would probably slowly stray away from wearing her jumpsuit.

35. Do they have power armor training? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Yes! Well, somewhat. Obviously, she was curious and asked Gunny to train her, but... lol. It's not like she ever uses it, or cared for it that much. She respects it, but she lives just fine without the need of power armor (lie). She also can't really sneak in that beast, so no thanks.

[theproblemcallednight]

wungo wednesday guys

i’m not ok. im very not ok. this is gonna kill me

spoilers for bsd s5 and maybe 110 but fuck knows wats happening next week

AYA BABY NO

SCREW UR BIO DAD HE CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF IN HELL. GO LIVE W KUNIKIDA AND BRAM

AYYAAAAAAAAAA. she’s my child my kid sister if something bad happens to her i will and i am not joking murder-

nsjsjsjs BRAM MY BOI PROTECT UR DAUGHTER. ILY BOTH TOO MUCH SISIIAJEHJQJSJSJD

omg sigma he’s beautiful

SIGMA RUN RUN RUN THATS A DEMON FROM HELL DONT LET HIM TOUCH U MY GODS DAZ WHAT DID BONES DO TO U

ok daz has a thing for cupping ppls cheeks. i will not eleborate

THIMBS UP????? WAIT TILL A GLOCK IS AT UR HEAD U STUPID BASTARD PEICE OF SHI-

i’m g the one time sigma can b happy 😭😭 he deserve the world wksjdndhd

BITCH. U CRAZY BITCH GET OUT IF HERE W UR DUMBASS ILL LEAVE THE REST TO U GO FACE UR RESPONSIBILITIES U LAZY ASS SACK OF SHIT BEFORE ME AND KUNIKIDA COME BEAT UR ASS

fuck. get out. i’m not crying u r

BOI U TELL HIM SHOOT HIS ANEMIC ASS. bro sigmas trying his best and it shows and i luv him with all my heart omfg

omg my boi

NDJDJDJS AYA YES. bother ur father until he does smth yes girl go go go go slay save the world i believe

oh but u care abt u daughter don’t u. cmon u can’t deny it. ayas ur daughter and there’s nothing u can do abt it

wait i didn’t capture it but she’s says father. so if it’s confirmed that aya is some reincarnation of brams daughter. good to have confirmation

DJDJDJ HE LOOKS SO BABYGIRL. and the way his voice went up omg. fedya baby y r u so fake ily

WHY CANT MY SILLIES COEXIST DAMMIT. CMON PLZ JUS LET THME BE GRUMPY COWORKERS NOT STABBING EACH OTHER

yes i would love to take ibuprofen w u rn i rlly need it

FATHER DAUGHTER IN COOL LIGHTING SJSJDBXBS i’m so normal abt them wdym

oh hi chuu i messed u. plz come back i need a happy ending i beg

ah yes daz being the ass as usual. i’ll let it pass this time tho.

yes the power of friendship will never go wrong skin manifest it bsd magical girls and then they beat fukichis ass

AAAKKFJDJDJD NOOOO DAZ

birch i hate u sm come back to me

bones where r the eyes don’t leave those out u cowards

oh nvm that’s my sleep paralysis demon

ADAM. VERLAINE. WELLS. SOMEONE. SHOW UP AND TANK THE DAMN NUKE PLZZZZZZZZ

BRAM

it’s red for his death 😭😭😭

well. that was a trip. idk what’s happening next week but bones better not fuck it up.

and that’s a wrap from ur tired delulu very upset abt 110 hostess

have a bsd day folks

[lucem-stellarum]

I want to draw your attention to some contrasts between our two rope wielding boys, Hush and Ivan. Their actions are similar, but are they truly so alike? It may be a common ASMR trope to wake up tied up in a bed, but Mr Redacted can't have done all of this by accident.

Under the cut because of canon typical violence and creepiness.

Ivan spends a lot of time reassuring Baby that they're safe with him. That he won't hurt them (unless they make him do it). If they were just good, he wouldn't have to treat them the way he does in their nightmares. He's only doing it to help them, to make them put themselves first and learn how to be loved and appreciated.

Hush on the other hand explicitly says that Doc shouldn't feel safe anywhere. That they're always in danger (though he doesn't really specify what that danger is, at the time of posting this; rn there are only the 2 videos) and should temper their expectations accordingly. After a bit of waffling back and forth he eventually decides he doesn't want to hurt Doc [physically], but later says that saving him from Reticuli will be something they regret, implying something very bad is going to happen because he's free.

This focus on safety and pain draws two very different pictures of these two characters. They both avoid responsibility for their actions but in very different ways. Ivan will only hurt Baby if they "deserve" it, emphasizing the gaslighting in order to subtly threaten them into compliance. Ill also draw attention to Ivan saying he won't hurt Baby "unless they want him to" with the clearly sexual implication. He wants Baby to belong to him, to give up their independence and freedom and submit to his will. Ivan wields pain and fear for the power it gives him over Baby. In contrast, Hush doesn't want to hurt Doc, but pain will almost certainly happen to someone(s) because of his purpose; it's not his fault he's doing what he was made to do. It depersonalizes Hush from the pain he will cause; it's a side effect rather than the end goal. He warns Doc that they're not going to like the "complicated answer" to what he is, but he doesn't seem particularly remorseful when they are hurt because of it. He doesn't have the usual sort of smug condescension when he says [I told you so] that you'd normally expect. He accepts that what he is hurts people. "Maybe someday knowing me won't have to hurt." Hush wields pain and violence as a matter of course, he will do whatever is necessary to achieve his goal. [He's only ever experienced physical contact through violence]; He doesn't know any other way to behave.

The way they both react to the listener struggling against the ropes is also very telling. Ivan tries to convince Baby to stop, that it’s in their best interest to relax and accept the restrictions. Ivan becomes distressed when Baby tries to escape, breaking the delusions he's built up about their "relationship", resorting to manipulations, threats, and gaslighting to force Baby to comply with his broken view of reality. Hush respects Doc's agency (I do understand how ironic that phrase is considering that he has them tied down) and doesn't seem to mind if they hurt themselves. He just says, "That's a conversation to be had between you and your epidermis"; he's willing to allow Doc the freedom to struggle even though it's useless and will only hurt them. He only uses the force necessary to keep Doc contained until he decides what to do with them; he's eminently practical about it all. Hush has no delusions about what he's doing, it's just the most expedient way to get what he wants. Ivan causes pain for it's own sake, sadistically enjoying the responses it gets (fair mention, he is being manipulated by a Sadism demon at the time, but they can't exaggerate what isn't already there).

Even their tone and word choice are very different. Ivan, especially in his first video, knows what he's doing is wrong. Listen to the way he speaks when talking about what happened to the listener's phone or why the ropes are necessary vs. talking about their friends ignoring them (basically the second half of the first 'kidnapped' video. It's more hesitant and almost questioning, like he's trying to come up with lies on the spot to convince the both of them that his actions are necessary, but he does believe in his own justifications. Ivan is a selfish man. He wants Baby, and does terrible things to keep them.

Hush, on the other hand, doesn't have any hesitation towards restraining Doc or killing Reticuli. He's very direct, actually, about when he won't answer a question or wants to change the subject. Instead, Hush gets more hesitant, less forthright in his word choice when talking about his own feelings and wants. "I think I want you to remember me," "I'm starting to think there's a lot of things I'd like to give you". His tone is only minorly different in those phrases compared to others; it's that same soft, even tone and cadence. There's no second guessing, no embarrassment. As far as we know, Hush hasn't lied to us. Can he even lie? It takes a lot of skill to lie well, and I'm not sure if he could pull it off. It's worrisome how he's "drunk the Kool aid" about his purpose; that unshakeable belief in his lack of individuality, that he's a force not a person, the ends justifying the means. He's a zealot on a mission, leaving the cult to carry out his master's plan.

Even though they start out taking similar actions (kidnapping and tying up the listener, invading personal space, hurting them) they both have very different motivations and relationships with pain and violence. I don't think we're getting another yandere kidnapper character with Hush, despite his actions so far. His way of reacting and reasoning is just too different from what we'd normally see in that archetype; besides, Blake and Regulus are still out there causing problems. I think Hush's personality traits align more with the Android Listener or James. Direct, impersonal, beholden to their creators/boss for a specific outcome. More powerful in different ways than the people around them. Doing whatever is necessary to achieve their purpose.

And just for the sake of posterity, Adam was also a creep who tied up the listener. For the purposes of this post he's similar enough to Ivan that I'm not going to repeat myself; Adam's motivations are pretty clear and simple, and his hedonism is close enough to Ivan's selfish sadism to not be worth more than a footnote.

[transgender-png]

i didn't wanna tack this on my last reblog bc its so long and i didnt wanna take away from ranboos speech either but. theres some specific parts my brain has latched on to from that.

first off being bazoingas, them acknowledging how busty their vtuber and people's art of them was hilarious. i love seeing him explore his identity more, i love that he's comfortable enough to do that. it gives me hope and courage to do the same, and i see a lot of myself in ranboo in terms of gender identity and expression. and something about the phrase "young queer kid" and how we helped that queer kid makes my heart sing. like. they were a young queer kid. they were scared at one point. just like me. just like a lot of us. but if he can make it this far, maybe we can too

and although the whole thing is mostly addressing what the community has been doing wrong recently, i melted when he mentioned how much he appreciates us. bAcK iN tHe dAy, before live streaming and especially twitch became so popular, there was always such a big barrier between the content creator and their audience. you knew your favourite CC appreciated you, sure, but you were always aware of that barrier and how it would always be there. now tho, for better or for worse (thafs a different topic that im too migrainey to tackle rn) that barrier has become a little.. transparent? i guess? it's more like glass now. it's still there, and you're still aware of it, but it has become so much easier to make a real connection with your audience as a creator, and vice versa.

seeing ranboo talk about how he has fun with chat and appreciates us.. it makes me happier than i can accurately describe. ranboo always seems genuinely excited to meet fans and is so active in their own community. it's one of the things about them that charmed me when i was first getting into their content, is how much they clearly loved their community.

but it also makes me sad how much he's been having to correct the community lately. i wont pretend im not part of that issue at all, bc im not perfect and ive definitely broken a rule or two or crossed a boundary once, intentional or not.

but ive been stepping away from ranboos content recently. part of it was not being into their new content as much, as im not a huge fan of horror (but that has been steadily changing for me) but a lot of it was the community. ive watched a lot of great fandoms and communities go sour because people cared too much about the wrong things. i don't want that to happen to something/one that has helped me so much.

but i don't want to end this on a bad note. one of my favourite parts of being a boober is the community (and the name). ranboo fans are some of the most creative, supportive, passionate (even if the passion is misplaced) and welcoming people ive met. even though its easy to forget, especially with what's been going on lately, i try to remind myself and others that there are good people in this community. they can be funny and witty and talented and inventive and observant and so many other things!! this community is filled with good people!!

and at the end of the day, we're qll here for more or less the same reason.

we like ranboo. we enjoy his content and his personality. for a lot of us, ranboo has helped us through some dark times, and led us to make some great friends. some of us are here from the old enderian-platonic-husband days and some of us are here from generation loss and some of us are here for the variety horror games and some of us are just here for minecraft content and a million other reasons. ranboo has charmed their way into the jearts of me and many others. some of us consider finding ranboo to be one of the best things to ever happen to us.

ive never been good at wrapping up these things but ig ill end with. remember where we all came from, and why we're all here.

whether you're a long term fan, a new boober, or have stepped away as the content has shifted, we all were impacted in some way, hopefully positive, by this creator. he's helped a lot kf us, whether it's with mental health, starting our own content creation journeys, inspiring us to make art or mess around with how we present ourselves, or just made us laugh with their jokes and offhand comments, we're all here because of ranboo.

and idk about you, but the fact that so many people can and do come together all because of one person.. that's pretty fucking beautiful to me.

basically, live, laugh, love ranboo. <3

[rianafying]

still here doing my assignment and journaling

maybe the reason i'm avoiding my home is because it represents all the tasks i fail at, and all the things i could lose, that aren't even that great to begin with. like it's an okay apartment at best if im being honest. and i cant find my passport that i need to look for, and my myki card, and what else, im taking a timelapse rn, i was watching a movie that i paused to do this journal entry, if i had some food to eat, i'd never leave this place, im really happy here, doing nothing, maybe what i want to do is nothing. maybe we all work hard so we can rest. how ironic is that? life. what about it? have i ever had a thought truly worth sharing? is that even what matters? shareability? originality? but it feels good to be valued. to be enough. but is it enough just to be enough in the eyes of others? is it enough to be enough in one's own eyes? what is enough to keep on going? i haven't had water in many many hours. i think i am seriously mentally ill. and i have these obsessions. and it's just moments before everyone finds out what a monster i truly am and punishes me for it. it's all i was born for, to be punished and then to be punished some more, for a crime i didn't commit, or for not knowing what crime im committing, it's just such a chore, to keep on living. but hank does it, and so does john, and they have siblings and spouses and kids to live for. i don't and i don't want to either, i want to leave guilt free. free to go anytime i want. i am free to go, im always free to go yet here i am. why. why is everyone still here? they're better people than i am. they're more appreciative of life, more grateful for things than i can ever even try to be. even with my active gratefulness meditaions, most people are better people than i am. because they are better to themselves. i try to be my kindest. things are so complicated, all these letters im tryping into a magic box as i sit in an air conditioned room thousands of feet above ground, looking over at the sprawling metropolis that is melbourne cbd. i create content, i turn it in, i go home, i thrift. what for? make it make sense. make it meaningful. or make it stop. my butt hurts a little from sitting in the same spot for hours. i really hope the light doesn't come back on. it's far too bright and i hate it. i feel like everything's so compkicated. i have to think about how im probably damaging my eye and health by looking at my screen in the dark and not having eaten in 2 days. i feel like we're all collectively moving towards surviving in a perfect equilibrium to the point where any minor inconvenience is enough to send us spiraling on a tangent. people used to hunt and gather before. therewas no stability. all i know now is fear of losing stability. it's all about moderation. about towing the line. not enough and too much. at the same time. i wish someone would love me in a way i understand, in a way that i could love them back. love has no meaning and no place in my life anymore. maybe i need to have one of those moments again, the kind that makes it all worth it. and to remember that. nothing lasts forever.

[ca-suffit]

to clarify something about the abuse asks.

I get a lot of asks every day. I sometimes have to skip over elaborating on everything I notice in a single ask bcuz there's 10 more behind it. I also am only human and capable of fucking up too. obviously my perception of what's a big deal or not will differ from others, as will our lived experience and whatever else.

I didn't think it was a big deal to not acknowledge the use of the word "abuse" in that initial ask bcuz I literally do see it as every character abusing each other at some point. that's a lot of what trauma does. I don't categorize ppl as "abusers" and I don't demonize the term "abuse" either. I think ppl should get a lot more comfortable with how often all of us abuse someone prbly every day tbh. if ur depressed and u ignore concerned friends and family reaching out for weeks or months, that's a form of abuse. if ur anxiety is spiking and u start screaming at coworkers or hit ur kid, that's abuse. it comes in a lot of forms, but we only look at a handful of them as "rly bad" and try to normalize the rest. this is largely why generational trauma is so prevalent too. everyone who does abusive shit thinks they're justified in doing it and doesn't see it as abuse. this is why I was saying I don't think louis is fully aware of his own behavior when he's v deep in grief and/or depression. it doesn't mean I think he deserved to get treated like shit for it in return or that he was the main offender. him and lestat talk past each other all the time and it took the fight and then the murder for them to start rly seeing more about each other and their relationship. lestat crossed a line so they killed him bcuz of it and yet the two of them are still drawn to each other anyway, so what does that mean now??

there is a difference between abusive behaviors and power dynamics tho. everyone in this series is abusive at some point but not all of them exist on equal ground with each other. so louis has moods at times but he's never the one with the power in his romantic relationships. he can hurt ppl like any of us could but he doesn't have the ability to "win" if it rly comes down to it. not physically. he only has this power otherwise over claudia and grace and we *do* see him use it at times.

louis and lestat are going to get back together by the end of the series. it's not a secret. I'm not saying this in a stupid shipping war way. it's a fact of the focus of the reason this story is being written. will the show tell a story that's satisfying to that end?? idfk. that's what they're *trying* to do tho. so at some point u *are* going to have to get comfortable with that and have empathy for "abusers," see them as ppl capable of change. they've said over and over that nobody is meant to be a "good" or "bad" person here. "are we the sum of our worst moments?" like I keep saying, real trauma, real mental illness, w/e else also acts like this. these characters are complex bcuz IRL these things are complex too. there's constantly a lot of cycling of so many things happening at once and u literally can't please everyone bcuz we're not all coming at this from the same exact places in understanding it.

so I am sry if maybe we don't at all align in a thought process. I am doing my best to answer things objectively that are about a lot of triggering shit for ppl across the board. maybe I need to take more time on certain asks and not skip over things as I notice them, but for most stuff I've been assuming that ppl can also do their own research, or that simply there's no one answer anyway so why bother giving it time. I'll try to be more careful on my end with certain subjects but I hope this helps give some clarity on where I'm coming from in this.

u can also send asks on this but I might sit on them a few days before answering rn.